- to relieve from something that confines, burdens or oppresses
I would say for quite some time I have been confined; and I am to blame for part in how I have let it control me.
Confined, angered and saddened by a past that was not mine to choose, but chose me and by decisions that were made that affected me, and were not mine to make. However, I was the one who continued to carry this with me as I grew into an adult and let it affect my heart and harden my soul. In the last year after suffering a significant loss, a rebirth of sorts with a past that I longed for, and a repair of a relationship that has been long overdue - I think I can finally say that I have come to a point where "release" is the best word that could describe what I am experiencing.
The road has not been easy, and there were times that were dark, but with the most important of family and friends standing by my side and seeing me through, I am finally growing into a place of maturity, a sense of self. and peace. Peace that has been long overdue.
I realize that as each day passes, it is one that we cannot get back; do we learn - yes, but it is still gone and when it leaves there are times when you realize you should let the negative go with it. In the end what do we have, each other - family and friends (which is a family in itself we create for ourselves). And that is the most important thing of all. All of the people who would show up no matter the circumstances, but just because they love you.
It has taken me so long to get here, but each day I feel more free and more of a sense of release from everything I have carried with me over the last 20+ years. I wish you all peace in your own lives, wherever or whatever that may be for each of you.
Can I get an "Amen"! :)
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